Step by step

The bridge was one of those long rope bridges with boards tied into it. It stretched all the way across the chasm. Many of the boards were missing or cracked and the ropes had split and were frayed in places. Penelope swallowed hard as she examined every crack or split in the tattered bridge. She looked down and it was hard to keep herself from imagining what might happen if the bridge failed and if she fell. She couldn't see the bottom of the chasm, and had been told that there was no bottom, that if she fell she would keep falling forever. She shuddered as a cool breeze blew up from below, she almost thought she heard whispers on the breeze, whispering her name, calling her to come.
She had been here before, she remembered the time when she had come across from the other side; how different it had been that time. The bridge was frightening then as well, but in a very different way. She remembered looking across from the other side and not knowing at all what was ahead, it seemed so long ago.
The uncertainty then of not knowing where she was going and who was there contrasted dramatically this time with a familiarity of knowing exactly where she was going, and exactly who was there. She realized with a start that it was almost more frightening this time because of that fact.
Penelope turned and looked behind her, the path was so warm and welcoming, so beautiful and green. She saw all the friends she'd made along the way, all smiling and holding out their arms as if to embrace her should she suddenly decide against this uncertain journey. She smiled at them and took a step in their direction, but something felt so wrong about it. She turned back to the bridge and there He was standing on it, smiling and beckoning.
She sighed with relief; it was her Father. She knew suddenly that if He was on the bridge with her she need not fear falling. He held out His hand to her and gave her an encouraging smile. "Come on Penelope, you can do it, I'll hold your hand."
She rushed to Him and then paused again looking down into the darkness, "Or you sure about this?" She asked in a shaky voice.
He laughed as though she had made a great joke, she looked into His eyes still fearful and wondering. He reached out with both hands to her, "Penelope, daughter, I'm always sure. If you cant trust me with your eyes open and seeing me, close them and hold my hands, shut out the darkness and uncertainty and doubt, and listen to my voice."
Penelope took a deep breath and grabbed her fathers hands, she closed her eyes and listened as he softly and confidently told her where to place her feet.
Finally she heard him say "Open your eyes daughter." She opened her eyes and met his gaze, then she looked around and realized that she was already on the other side of the bridge.

Bucket list

These are those things that I have to do before I die:
-Go to Australia
-Be a Wife and a Mother
-Kiss my Husband
-Go Salmon fishing
-Own a puppy
-Make friends all over the world
-Lead a Muslim to the Lord
-Get a full body massage
-See Les Misrebles
-Jump a train (that should maybe be the last thing on my bucket list)
-See the white cliffs of Dover
-Go to Italy
-Go to Ireland
-Go sky diving
-Be fearless
-Write and publish my own book
-Ride an Elephant in Thailand
-Climb Mt. Rainier
-Touch Mt. Everest


there are more... I'll add them later.

The Blind Poem

The world was once so full
And now there is nothing.
A blank page, an empty scroll
A closed book, a searching soul

Once was light and now darkness
All light has failed to shine
I’ve searched and searched and cannot find
The sight that once was mine.

In a moment you can lose
All that you have known
In a moment you can choose
To keep what should be grown.

In darkness and confusion I stumble over a chair
I don’t know where it came from; I did not see it there.
Do I move one more step? Do I even dare?
When every step I take could send me falling, falling, falling

These things remain to me
I can feel, I can hear
But is that enough to be free?
Is that enough to once again see?

Take a step; find a snare
Turn one way; turn to where?
Noises, voices; all around
If I speak will you hear the sound?

Calling, crying, loudly trying
Let my voice reach your ears
Please take pity on my tears.
I am wasting all these years; not seeing you.

Revelations from lakes

The other day I was on my way home on the bus. It was a particularly sunny and beautiful day and I heard Father whisper in my ear "Come away with me." I got off at the next stop and walked back into Kirkland and sat on the edge of the dock. The wind was perfect and there were so many sailboats out on the water, I just sat alone with Papa on a much needed Daddy/Daughter date. The waves were very choppy because of the wind and occasionally a stray wave would leap up and tickle the bottom of my feet. I loved it and every time it happened I would smile and tell Father how happy I was.
Finally Father directed my gaze downward and I looked into the wild waves, He told me to look deeper and as I did a school of fish caught my eye. They were swimming perfectly in formation and I was struck by the fact that they moved smoothly underneith the choppy surface of the water. And then Father said quietly "It's crazy on top but it's calm and peaceful underneith. That's how I want you to be. When life is crazy you'll have peace underneith it all." I frowned and asked Him "But how? I'm never calm underneith!" And He answered "Just know and trust that it's I who move the wind."
Happy thought.